LIFE NO.DEATH YES!

So,life must be go on like usual.But wait,this time I'm not gonna post about him but the life of FQ.Yeah that's me.I've been changing school last year.It's quite hard for me to forget all those memories with friends and siblings :( The hostel was kinda bored.I'm just had a FAKE my smile so  everybody won't even know that I hate living in those prison.It hurts the most when all your life being  fully controlled  by the rules!rules!and rules! You can't be free as a bird out of the cage.Friends are just friends for me,but they were not my friends as AWIN,DIANA, ;(When I took my shower,tears came down through the cheeks.I WANT MY LIFE BACK ! I WANT WHERE I CAN STAY UP ALL NIGHT,HEAR THOSE SAD PIANO SONG..BUT hmmm*sigh* everything  was gone without my realising.Haters are always there even well I don't know what to type and lose ideas cause I can't control the tears which is coming out right now while I'm typing this.The teachers was quite okay,but I hate the course. that I TAKE.It's not my choice at all,but my parents who forced me to be in the Mechanical Engineering course.I wanted to be a DOLL FASHION DESIGNER  but everything  ruin .My sketches,my designs who wants it? No one want to see it.It's priceless said mom to me :'(I have no strength to continue all of this.I fed up with all of this.I have no life well you can see right? I'm being controlled by people around me to do this,to choose this,to wear this and so on ! Damn Shit! This is not gonna end like this.Dear My Lord,if this is the  test that you give towards me,I accept it it with  open heart even it's complicated.